The 10 Sex Questions Everyone’s Googling in 2025 (And How to Actually Answer Them)

The 10 Sex Questions Everyone’s Googling in 2025 (And How to Actually Answer Them)

Sex in 2025 looks different than it did a decade ago. People are searching online for answers to questions they’re too embarrassed, or curious, to ask out loud. From libido struggles to fantasies that feel taboo, these are the sex questions everyone is Googling.

As relationship and sex therapists, we’ve seen how common these concerns are, and how much relief comes from getting clear, honest answers. Here’s the scoop on the 10 most-searched questions about sex and intimacy and how to actually address them.

1. How Do I Have Sex? (Yes, People Still Ask This)

It may seem basic, but “How to have sex?” continues to be the top-searched sex question in 2025. Many people, especially younger adults or those entering new relationships, want guidance on technique, communication, and comfort.

The answer: There’s no one “right” way. Start by focusing on consent, connection, and curiosity. Exploring your body and your partner’s preferences, discussing boundaries, and prioritizing pleasure over performance can make sex more enjoyable for everyone.

2. Why Do I Bleed After Sex?

Bleeding can be scary, and it’s a common reason people search online. Causes range from minor issues like vaginal dryness or minor irritation to medical conditions such as cervical polyps or infections.

The answer: Always rule out medical causes first with a healthcare provider. If no medical issue is found, a sex therapist can help you address emotional factors like anxiety, tension, or discomfort that may be contributing to painful sex.

3. Is Masturbation Normal?

Despite being one of the most natural sexual activities, masturbation still triggers guilt or curiosity.

The answer: Yes, masturbation is normal, healthy, and even beneficial. It helps you understand your body, relieve stress, and enhance sexual confidence. If it feels compulsive or interferes with daily life, a therapist can help you find balance.

4. What Is Autosexuality?

Autosexuality is a term for individuals who experience sexual attraction primarily to themselves. It emphasizes self-love, exploration, and pleasure.

The answer: Autosexuality is a valid orientation. Embracing it can improve self-esteem and intimacy. If you’re exploring this identity, a sex therapist provides a safe, judgment-free space for understanding your desires and boundaries.

5. How Long Should Sex REALLY Last?

Many people worry they’re “too fast” or “too slow” in bed.

The answer: There’s no magic number. Sexual satisfaction is about mutual enjoyment, not minutes on a timer. Communicate openly with your partner about preferences, and explore what brings both of you pleasure rather than focusing on duration.

6. Is It Normal to Experience Pain During Sex?

Painful sex, or dyspareunia, is more common than people think. It can stem from physical issues like infections, hormonal changes, or pelvic floor tension, as well as emotional stress or trauma.

The answer: Seek medical guidance first. Then, consider therapy to work through any emotional blocks or anxiety. Together, these approaches can help make sexual experiences comfortable and enjoyable again.

7. What Is “Shallowing” in Sexual Activity?

“Shallowing” refers to light stimulation at the vaginal opening without deep penetration. It’s popular for people exploring different forms of intimacy or prioritizing external stimulation.

The answer: Shallowing can be deeply pleasurable and is a valid form of sexual expression. Experimenting with different types of touch can expand intimacy and enjoyment.

8. Low Libido? How to Turn the Heat Back On

A drop in sexual desire is normal across the lifespan. Stress, hormones, life transitions, and relationship dynamics all play a role.

The answer: Boost libido by addressing physical health, emotional wellbeing, and relational connection. Communication with your partner is key. A Chicago sex therapist can help identify underlying factors and create practical strategies to reignite desire.

9. What Is Ethical Non-Monogamy?

More people are curious about consensual non-monogamy (CNM), polyamory, or open relationships—but fear the emotional complexity.

The answer: CNM can be fulfilling if approached intentionally. Clear boundaries, ongoing communication, and emotional honesty are essential. Therapy can guide couples through jealousy, compersion, and navigating multiple partnerships safely.

10. How Do I Talk to My Partner About Sexual Desires?

Many people fear judgment or rejection when discussing fantasies or desires.

The answer: Approach conversations with empathy and curiosity. Use “I” statements, focus on what excites you rather than demands, and prioritize listening. A therapist can provide strategies to make these discussions easier and more productive.

Why People Turn to a Chicago Sex Therapist

Curiosity alone isn’t a problem; it’s a doorway to better sexual health. Working with a sex therapist helps you:

• Navigate awkward or uncomfortable questions.

• Address performance anxiety, low libido, or intimacy gaps.

• Explore fantasies and sexual identity safely.

• Improve communication with partners.

• Reduce shame and increase pleasure.

At Embrace Sexual Wellness we provide a safe, judgment-free space to answer these questions and guide you toward a more satisfying sexual life. Book your free consult here to get started!

TLDR

The questions people are Googling about sex in 2025 reveal curiosity, uncertainty, and a desire for connection. Whether it’s learning how to talk about fantasies, addressing painful sex, exploring CNM, or simply understanding masturbation and libido, getting clear, professional guidance can transform your sexual experiences.

You’re not alone in these questions and the answers are out there. Sometimes, the best way to get them is with a certified sex therapist who can provide personalized insight, support, and strategies for sexual and relational wellbeing.

How Can I Talk to My Partner About Our Sexual Problems Without Fighting?

How to Talk About Sexual Problems Without It Leading to A Fight

Sexual issues in a long-term relationship don’t show up overnight and they don’t fix themselves overnight either. Whether you’re dealing with low libido, performance anxiety, or a sense that you’ve become “just roommates,” bringing up these concerns with your partner can feel overwhelming.

You may worry that you’ll hurt their feelings, trigger a fight, or get shut down completely. So instead, many couples avoid the topic altogether… until the silence becomes its own kind of problem.

The good news? You can talk about sexual problems in a way that leads to understanding instead of defensiveness. It takes intention, patience, and a few key tools, but it’s possible.

Here’s how to start…

Know That You’re Not Alone and You’re Not Failing

Let’s normalize this: many couples struggle with sex at some point. This could be due to stress, parenting demands, medical or hormonal shifts, emotional disconnection, past trauma, or simply different libidos. It’s not a sign that your relationship is broken; it’s a sign that something needs your attention.

What often turns discomfort into conflict is the way we bring it up, especially when it’s been simmering for a while. That’s why laying the emotional groundwork matters.

Get Clear on What You’re Feeling Before You Bring It Up

Before you talk to your partner, take time to get curious about your own experience. Are you feeling rejected? Embarrassed? Lonely? Anxious about initiating? Pressured when they do?

Write it down. Speak it out loud. Journal, talk to a friend, or even try rehearsing what you’d want to say in therapy.

Clarity helps you approach the conversation with more compassion and less reactivity.

Choose the Right Time (Hint: Not in the Bedroom)

Don’t bring it up in the middle of intimacy or right after a failed attempt at connection. Emotions are raw in those moments, and it’s easy for both people to feel blamed or shut down.

Instead, choose a neutral, low-stress time to talk, maybe on a walk, over coffee, or during a planned check-in. A simple way to begin might be:

“I’ve been thinking a lot about how we’ve been feeling disconnected physically, and I’d really love to talk about it, not because I want to fight, but because I want us to feel closer.”

Framing the conversation as a bid for connection rather than a criticism sets the tone for collaboration.

Use “I” Statements, Not “You Never…” or “You Always…”

Statements like “You never want sex anymore” or “You always turn me down” immediately put your partner on the defensive.

Instead, focus on your experience:

• “I’ve been feeling distant lately, and I miss feeling close to you.”

• “I’m craving more intimacy, and I’m not sure how to talk about it without feeling nervous.”

• “I’m starting to feel anxious about our sex life, and I want us to figure it out together.”

This subtle shift invites understanding instead of blame.

Be Curious, Not Just Correct

Remember, there are two people in this dynamic and both of you bring feelings, fears, and expectations to the table. If your partner seems withdrawn sexually, there’s likely something underneath: stress, insecurity, pressure, shame, or even past rejection.

Instead of jumping to conclusions, try asking:

• “How do you feel about our sex life lately?”

• “Are there things that make it hard for you to feel connected or in the mood?”

• “Is there something I’m doing (or not doing) that you haven’t shared with me yet?”

These questions require vulnerability, yes, and they also open the door to honesty.

Don’t Try to Solve Everything in One Conversation

Big sexual issues are rarely resolved in one sitting. And putting that kind of pressure on a single conversation can make both partners tense or overwhelmed.

Instead, think of this as the start of an ongoing dialogue. Your goal is progress, not perfection.

If it helps, say it out loud:

“We don’t have to solve this all today. I just want us to start talking about it, and keep talking about it.”

Recognize the Role of Shame and Push Back Gently

For many people, especially those raised with little sex education or lots of sexual shame, conversations about intimacy can bring up feelings of inadequacy or guilt.

If your partner gets quiet or defensive, consider what might be happening under the surface. They may not know how to talk about sex without feeling like they’ve failed you, or themselves.

Let them know you’re not looking for blame. You’re looking for closeness.

Sometimes it helps to say:

“This isn’t about who’s right or wrong. I just want us to feel good together again, emotionally and physically.”

Consider Professional Support If You’re Feeling Stuck

Sometimes the communication tools just aren’t enough, not because you’re doing it wrong, but because the issues go deeper than what you can unpack alone.

Couples often come to sex therapy after months or even years of avoidance, frustration, or hurt feelings. Therapy offers a space to name the patterns, uncover what’s really going on, and build new ways to reconnect both emotionally and sexually.

Whether it’s low libido, mismatched desire, painful sex, performance anxiety, or the “we’re just roommates now” dynamic, there’s help. And there’s hope.

TLDR

Talking about sex is vulnerable, but it’s also one of the most powerful things you can do for your relationship. It’s not about perfection or frequency or performance. It’s about feeling seen, desired, and emotionally safe with your partner.

You don’t need to fight to be heard. You just need the right tools, the right timing, and the willingness to show up gently and honestly.

Ready to Take the Next Step?

At Embrace Sexual Wellness, we help couples navigate sexual disconnection, low libido, and performance anxiety in a supportive, nonjudgmental space. Our team of sex and relationship therapists are licensed in Illinois, Idaho, Indiana, Kansas & Louisiana. Book a free intro consult call with us today!

What Is the Role of a Sex Therapist in Enhancing Intimacy? How Couples and Individuals Rebuild Connection, Trust, and Sexual Wellness

What Is the Role of a Sex Therapist in Enhancing Intimacy?

In our fast-paced world, it’s not uncommon for couples and individuals to feel disconnected from their intimate lives. Whether due to sexual dysfunction, misaligned desires, or communication breakdowns, issues around intimacy can quietly strain even the strongest relationships.

Understanding the role of a sex therapist is essential for those seeking to restore closeness, improve sexual wellness, and navigate emotional or relational challenges with greater insight and clarity.

At Embrace Sexual Wellness, we specialize in helping people build more fulfilling intimate connections. Our practice integrates evidence-based therapy with a compassionate, individualized approach to sexual health.

The Scope of Sex Therapy: Beyond the Physical

Sex therapy is often misunderstood as being solely focused on sexual performance. In reality, it’s a specialized form of psychotherapy that addresses the psychological, relational, emotional, and physical dimensions of sexuality.

Our work frequently includes support for individuals and couples experiencing:

• Low sexual desire or mismatched libidos

• Pain during intercourse or arousal difficulties

• Communication struggles around sex

• Performance anxiety or avoidance of intimacy

• Impact of trauma, stress, or past experiences on sexual expression

• Transitions in intimacy due to parenthood, aging, or medical conditions

Therapy sessions may focus on individual concerns, couple dynamics, or both depending on the needs and goals of the client(s). Learn more about our individual therapy services and couples therapy.

Enhancing Intimacy Through Communication and Emotional Insight

One of the most common challenges couples face is the inability to talk openly and constructively about sex. This communication gap often leads to assumptions, resentment, or emotional withdrawal, making physical intimacy even more difficult.

Sex therapy offers a safe, nonjudgmental space to:

• Clarify personal values, boundaries, and needs around intimacy

• Understand each partner’s emotional triggers or vulnerabilities

• Practice healthier communication techniques

• Resolve unspoken tension that may be undermining desire or connection

By fostering emotional safety and mutual understanding, clients begin to reconnect—not just physically, but emotionally.

Addressing Sexual Challenges With Clinical Precision

Many clients seek out therapy after experiencing persistent sexual difficulties such as pain with intercourse (e.g., dyspareunia), erectile concerns, anorgasmia, or loss of desire. These symptoms may have physiological components, but are often exacerbated by stress, unresolved emotional patterns, or relational strain.

At Embrace Sexual Wellness, we take a holistic approach that may include:

• Psychoeducation about anatomy, arousal, and the sexual response cycle

• Referrals to medical providers or pelvic floor specialists as needed

• Trauma-informed techniques to reduce anxiety or fear

• Structured exercises (such as sensate focus) to rebuild comfort and trust

We are committed to destigmatizing these issues and helping clients move toward pleasure, ease, and confidence in their sexual experiences.

Supporting Individuals in Life Transitions

Intimacy is deeply affected by life’s transition including parenthood, career shifts, illness, aging, and grief can all disrupt one’s sense of identity, body, or connection with a partner.

In therapy, we work with individuals who are navigating:

• Postpartum changes in desire and body image

• Relationship changes following a diagnosis or chronic illness

• Rediscovery of sexual identity or preferences

• Healing from previous sexual trauma

By helping clients process these shifts and reconnect with themselves, we lay the foundation for more authentic and satisfying relationships.

When Couples Feel Distant: Rebuilding Intimacy

Many couples arrive at therapy feeling more like roommates than partners. There may be affection, shared values, and commitment—but a lack of passion, touch, or closeness.

In these cases, therapy provides a guided, supportive framework to:

• Identify barriers to intimacy—emotional, logistical, or sexual

• Reintroduce physical touch without pressure or expectation

• Develop new rituals of connection and affection

• Rebuild a sense of eroticism in long-term relationships

Sexual disconnection is rarely about technique; it’s usually about emotional safety, unresolved conflict, or years of silent compromise. Therapy helps partners realign and rediscover one another, often in profound ways.

A Confidential, Thoughtful Environment for Growth

We are committed to clinical excellence and individualized care. Our therapists are licensed professionals with advanced training in sex therapy, relational dynamics, and trauma-informed care.

We understand that seeking help can feel vulnerable. Our Chicago office offers a private, respectful, and welcoming space both in-person and via our secure telehealth platform for clients to begin this important work. Whether you're looking to resolve a specific issue or seeking a deeper sense of connection and vitality in your intimate life, sex therapy can be an invaluable resource.

Ready to Begin?

You don’t have to settle for disconnection or frustration in your relationship or with yourself. With the right guidance, healing is not only possible, but within reach.

Schedule a complimentary confidential phone consultation to learn more about our approach to therapy. Let’s begin the process of rebuilding trust, desire, and connection on your terms.